To Have Courage

A good friend of mine recently bought this picture for me because I told her how much I love it. I love the way that the word courage has broken out of the darkness into this beautiful bright color. I love the splatters and the random colors everywhere. Courage is messy. I wouldn't define courage as standing tall completely confident and unafraid. No, courage means taking one tiny terrified step of obedience after another. 

I love the word courage. Not that I have courage, but that always I've needed it. And God always provides it. Not that he provides courage by removing fear, but courage comes from knowing that He is holding my hand through everything. Knowing that the Lord of heaven and earth has a secure grip on me. A grip that neither living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable, or absolutely anything else will ever be able to loosen. Courage doesn't mean that you are never afraid. It means that while trembling in fear, you still do the thing you think you cannot do. 

Sometimes when I say, "God, I'm too afraid to do that."

 He says, "Then do it afraid. I'll be with you." He doesn't ask for absolute courage, just absolute obedience. 

When I say, "God, I'm afraid," He doesn't offer me a million reasons why I shouldn't be afraid and why my fear is irrational. He knows me better than that. All He says is, "I'm here." And that's enough. And He reminds me that there has never been a single moment in my life that He has EVER left my side. 

Looking at this art helps me remember that God gave me courage yesterday so I know He will give me courage again today. Looking back over every part of my life I remember He gave me courage then so I know He will give me courage now. 

I've learned a lot about courage. I've learned that courage means you dare to show your whole heart. Courage means you trust anyway, you try anyway, you love anyway. That no matter how many times the world tells you that you can't, you rise up because your God has told you that you can. Courage means trying even if you're afraid you will fail. Courage means choosing to see the good even when everything is falling apart. Courage means choosing to believe God's truth despite what you may be feeling. 

We need a lot of courage to live in the world today. Thankfully our God is an endless supplier of courage. Sometimes the most courage that we can manage is to be able to ask God for courage. And God loves when we come to Him, trembling in fear and ask to be made courageous. He loves when we bring our weakness and inability because thats when His power is made perfect. Sometimes courage means surrendering to God's will for your life. Sometimes it means forgiving someone, sometimes it means asking for forgiveness. Whatever courage looks like for you at this point in your life, know that we have a God who loves to encourage and strengthen us and fill us with His courage.

Joshua 1:9 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

Come to Me- Bethel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xT_bj2qBfoI

Comparing God to people

Sometimes I miss God. Even though He’s everywhere

For me, feeling God's presence is like being wrapped in a big warm comfy hug ALL THE TIME. It’s the best. 

Except when I, ‘don’t have time,’ or I’m, ‘too busy.’

And then that’s when I start to miss him. My heart aches for just a little bit more time with him, one more word from him, five more minutes hiding away from the world resting in his comfort and stability. Because even when my entire world is falling apart, even when everything is turned upside down, when I get away with him to a quiet place, I find safety. He steadies me.

Sometimes I’m feeling convicted and a voice in my head tells me I have no right to stand before my heavenly father.

I think that sometimes the thing that keeps us from God, creates a distance between us, is us having a distorted view of who God is and who He says that we are.

Ann Voskamp said, “Why do we continue to fight God and lash about in His grasp like He’s a big Taker instead of a Giver? What is it we think He’s trying to rob us of? To whom have we compared Him so that we’ve assumed we cannot trust Him?”

To whom have YOU compared God to that distorts your view of who He actually is and how He actually responds to you?

God doesn't throw us under the bus! He isn't a nagging, constantly criticizing God who hands us an enormous list of our sins and says, "Fix all of these things about yourself and then we'll talk."

 No my God is kind. My God is loving. Though He sees my sin He never condemns me. He never heaps shame on me or makes me feel like a failure. 

Numbers 23:19 “God is not a man, that He should lie,
Nor a son of man, that He should repent.
Has He said, and will He not do?
 Or has He spoken, and will He not make it good?”

Instead, He lovingly takes my hand, lifts my head that is hung down in defeat and says, "You are not alone. We are going to do it together. Trust me and I will do the work of making you more like me. Just stay close to my side."

Sometimes Jesus says to me, “I love you,” and I think, “Really Lord? Do you know me? Because I want to punch that guy who just cut me off in traffic, sometimes I choose sleep over bible reading, and I often get frustrated and don’t use my words in the most loving way. Not to mention that my scripture memorization is laughable and sometimes I let fear get the best of me." I’m a mess.

The temptation is always to save ourselves, try to clean ourselves up and THEN Jesus will love us right? But Jesus loves messes.

He loves when we acknowledge how broken and desperately in need of Him we are. God can do amazing healing work in our lives, and the best place for him to do this is right in the middle of your mess, your failure, your weakness, your insecurity, your doubt, your frustrations and fears.

It is a beautiful thing when we take all of ourselves, the parts we like and the parts we don’t like, our hurts, and trials and experiences and lay them at the foot of the cross. It is a beautiful thing when we are open and vulnerable with others, allowing them to see what God can also do with their messes. 

God is not surprised that we are messes, He knows our hearts inside and out.

He understands that our world sometimes taints our view of Him. Before I accepted Him into my heart and life, I had a very skewed perception of Him. My labels for God were, finger pointer, lightening bolt thrower, harsh, angry, critical, demanding, judgmental, unloving and uncaring.

Not such a pretty picture huh? Who would want a God like that? I sure didn’t.

I think that this is the view a lot of people have of God. And that makes me so sad, because I spent a lot of time running from a God that I thought I knew when my loving Father was waiting there the whole time with arms wide open. 

And God knows this. He is aware of all the things that my heart needs Him to be for me. He knows all of the things I thought Him to be that He is now proving He’s not.

He knows that I need him to be my dad. I need him to be my protector. My comforter. My redeemer. My healer. My friend. My counselor. My peace bringer. My refuge.

Now I know a God who’s heart overflows with love and grace. I know a God who is not only righteous and strong, but also gentle and kind.

Just like we put wrong labels on God, sometimes we put wrong labels on ourselves. But no matter what labels we stick on ourselves, the only ones that matter are the ones that He gives to us.

Precious daughter.

Sought after.

 Unblemished.

Beloved.

His.